Trapped in the Dark (For eyes_that_burn)

[sanzengarasu]

“Itachi-san… I can try to wash it for you.” Her voice felt like sand paper on skin. Not because of the sound itself, but the implication behind it.

Slowly sliding the fabric through his fingers, he meticulously checked for tears in it that would make the piece of clothing unsalvageable. Dark, dull eyes stared unseeing almost as though he could while a line furrowed into his forehead. “No. It’s fine.” It felt like he said it too many times, but she still insisted.

“But, you can’t see…”

“It’s fine.” His voice clipped her’s off sharply as his fingers stilled. Itachi rarely used that tone outside of battle or when he purposely wanted to put on that persona necessary to fool the world of who and what he stood for. It caused something to twist in his stomach sharply as it shot a memory straight to his mind’s eye of when and how he used it on Sasuke. Part of being an Uchiha was a memory that proved clear as photographs and that proved a blessing and a curse.

“I… I see. Um…” He could almost hear the wringing of her hands as she hovered not far from him. Finally he felt something set down beside his hip making his muscles tense. “That’s the detergent you asked for. If… i-if you need help, just push the call button. It’s over—“

“Thank you.” Cutting her off again, he carefully picked up the detergent and rose to his feet. Without waiting for the door to close, he moved toward the bathroom. Itachi followed a path, just like he memorized and shifted the shirt over his arm. Opening the door carefully, he managed to only fumble a few times before settling the things on the counter.

Running his hands over the sink and faucet he searched for a way to plug the sink. His arm hit something and a loud clatter echoed through the tiny room. The hum of something rolling followed and he attempted to grab for the item only to barely brush the object before it slipped away and off the counter top. Mere seconds and the sound of shattering glass filled the air. “Ah…”

The corners of his lips turned down hard as he stared blankly in the direction of the broken glass object. Lifting a hand to rub his face, he noted the feeling of a few shards brushing against his feet warning him that walking now might prove a bad idea. His fingers curled against his hair and raked backward to the back of his neck as he bowed his head. The silence of the bathroom now was deafening and for the first time in a very long time, he felt helpless. A cold rock of discomfort settled in his stomach making him feel nauseated.

Just think.

Breathing in slowly, he knew he couldn’t call for help. He didn’t want to feel that sinking defeat eat at him like that. Giving up meant saying he couldn’t travel with Sasuke and that wasn’t an option. Closing his eyes, he ran his hand over his face before splaying his fingers out to brush the long strands back.

I can figure this out.

Grabbing the shirt, he let out a light sigh. Lowering down to the rest on his heels, he very carefully used the material to sweep the floor methodically away from walking space. The lines of his face hardened, as he tried to turn at the waist carefully and not move his feet too much. Rattling and clinking of shards across tile caused his jaw to tighten sharply almost making his head hurt as his nerves set on edge. Every muscles tensed in his legs and back as he focused on the task at hand. This was a test run. Surviving on his own and learning to navigate. Failure was not an option. Not if he wanted to be a functional part of his brother’s life and not just… an invalid.

Itachi almost felt the air shift as the door flew open. “ITACHI!”

Everything happened at once. His body reacted quickly, one foot moved for balance and his back hit hard against the bathroom wall. He felt the piercing of skin as a stray sharp cut into the ball of his foot and then the sound of a thud followed as he dropped his head back against the wall. Obviously, survival never included the unexpected adrenaline rush that came from Uzumaki Naruto’s loud voice and less than subtle entrances.

“Oi! Itachi!” Sighing softly, he turned his eyes over to the entrance to the bathroom and lifted a brow slowly. “Oh hey, what are you doing down there? Eh! Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Mostly. Feeling the other kneeling next to him, he could almost see the blonde grimace at the entire scene before him.

“You’re bleeding. I should get a…”

“No. Please don’t.” The last thing he wanted or needed was for that nurse to think she needed to come back into the room. She would likely never leave him alone after this. “Could you just…”

“I got it, I got it!” The next thing he knew, he felt the blonde’s arm sliding behind his back while his own arm was being pulled around Naruto’s neck. Not what he had in mind, but he didn’t argue. Instead he rose with the pull and he let Naruto drag him out of the bathroom and back to the bed. Sinking onto the thin mattress, he frowned as he looked in the general direction of his feet. The air shifted in front of his face and Itachi realized what was happening. Naruto was waving a hand in front of his eyes. “So, it’s true. You really can’t see anything…” Evident shock colored that tone and made him frown harder.

Catching the other’s wrist, he lifting the flat gaze to the blonde and frowned at him. His grip stayed light as he pushed the appendage back in a silent request for him to stop. “Anyway, what were you trying to do in there?”

“Wash my clothes.” He answered in the strictest fashion of minimal emotion, even if his emotions felt closer to a storm raging inside.

“But you were…” A rustling of hair made Itachi tilt his head. Naruto must be rubbing his own head in confusion. “Oh…” Suddenly everything went quiet and footsteps indicated Naruto was moving about the room. After a while, he heard him close again. “Oi, I’m going to check your foot now, okay? So don’t kick me.” He could hear the nervous laugh in his tone and vaguely appreciated the attempt to make everything seem alright in that moment.

“Understood.” Nodding once, he felt a hand carefully grab his foot. Biting into his lower lip, he fought down the ticklish sensation of someone else touching sensitive skin.

“Haha! You’re ticklish, dattebayo!”

“I am not.” Itachi bit back a little too quickly.

“You are! I can see it! You’re trying not to smile!” This time the laugh wasn’t nervous and the uncertainty in the blonde’s motions disappeared as be became more certain. “Does Sasuke know? Does he?” Itachi could feel his own eyes widening and it caused the younger to erupt into laughter. “HE DOESN’T KNOW!”

“Naruto…” He put every ounce of disapproval into his voice. Sasuke didn’t need to be bothered with something so trivial… but was that really why he didn’t want Naruto to mention it?

“Hehe… I can’t wait to tell that teme about this.” He felt like he might strain a muscle in his face if he frowned any harder. At least he could say he didn’t flinch or move when he felt the other man pull the offending piece of glass out of the wound and start to clean it. Actually, he had a harder time not reacting to the cleaning as the cloth being used only served to set of that ticklish sensation even more. Naruto continued to laugh to himself as he finally bandaged up the foot.

That’s when it dawned on him. Naruto was using two hands. “The prosthetic…”

“Ah! It worked out pretty well. Still figuring it out, but it is pretty awesome.” He could practically hear the smile in the younger’s voice. “I’m almost glad you can’t see this mess I just made of your bandage, but it’s the thought that counts right?”

“Hmph…” The sound came out more amused than he expected it to and in the end, he smiled a little finally. “I’m glad.”

“You know, you should make Sasuke consider getting one…” Naruto’s voice was soft and careful. Like he was afraid the suggestion might make him fly away suddenly.

“That’s up to Sasuke.” His answer came quick and to the point. He would never force his brother to make any decision. Not anymore.

The sound of a long suffering sigh filled the room and he made out the grumbling that sounded suspiciously like ‘stubborn Uchiha’ before Naruto rose to his feet. In the next instant, he heard the door open. “Oi! Hey! I kinda broke something in here, could you come clean it up?” Naruto’s ‘embarrassed’ laugh met his ears as his voice erupted into the hallway. He took the blame for the broken glass. Something about that made him stare in his direction in slight surprise. So much so, his own thoughts distracted him from the amused conversation that followed as a nurse and he laughed over his ‘clumsiness’.

Soon after, he could hear the sound of a broom smoothing across the tiles and the rattling of broken glass being swept into the dust pan. “Now that’s settled! Let’s go shopping!”

Blinking in surprise, his head rose toward the other’s voice as he frowned again. “What?”

“Don’t look so surprised! I, Uzumaki Naruto, will be taking you shopping because that shirt has seen its last days and you are in dire need of new clothes.” Even without his vision, Itachi felt blinded by the smile that was on Naruto’s face at that moment.

“But…”

“Nope! You are not allowed to refuse, dattebayo! Otherwise Sasuke gets to find out your little secret.” How did someone so good sound so sinister in that moment?

“That’s blackmail.” All he got in reply was a snicker. And then suddenly clothes were dumped in his hands. A questioning look flitted over his face as he shifted the scratchy fabric.

“Scrubs are all you got till we get ya something else. So… what’ll it be Itachi?”

A long sigh escaped his lips. “You left me no choice.”

“Great! Get dressed and let’s go!”

Huffing at the exuberance, he had a feeling he would regret this. But he was starting to see why Naruto was so hard to beat. Not because of the blackmail, but because of his unrelenting persistence. “Very well.” It should be fine… and he wanted out of the hospital issue gown. What could go wrong?

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A cacophony of sound hit like a barrage against his senses. Voices of different pitch and tone came from all directions. His nerves felt raw as he fought the urge to turn his head at every single sound he heard. The crash of something falling about ten yards to the left, the yell of kids and thundering of footsteps as they ran by (probably from the same crash), the call of salespeople in overly cheery voices, and the whispers… the whispers burned the most. He found his ears trying to tune into their words as much as he could even when he didn’t want to hear.

It had him so turned around, he tensed each time Naruto pulled his sleeve.

Lips parted to say something to the blonde as he pulled him in a sudden direction throwing him off balance. But all that came out was a soft grunt as he caught his footing and he desperately tried to orient himself without looking lost on the surface. This was vaguely terrifying and he dared not admit it out loud.

If Naruto let go…

Suddenly he found himself doing something he didn’t think he would ever do. His hand suddenly turned and long fingers wrapped around the teen’s wrist almost desperately. Something that made the blonde finally stop and the tension between their arms relaxed.

“You okay, Itachi?” His brain felt like water or a boat being tossed about on rapids. His breathing was harsher than he noticed while moving and a hand not clinging to the blonde rose to cover his mouth as he held his breath. His lungs burned and his chest tied up in knots. “Hey… what’s wrong?”

For all the worry in that voice, Itachi clutched harder at the younger’s arm not wanting him to wander off while he pulled himself together. Something that didn’t seem to go unnoticed by the blonde as his other hand rose up to rest on the opposite shoulder and squeeze lightly. “Just… give me a minute.” He carefully used the hand he’d been using to stifle the coughing to pull the second hand gently away. Too much touch still made him uncomfortable, but he didn’t want to seem rude either for the kind gesture. Itachi just didn’t want to be treated like an invalid…

But I am one…

His expression fell at that truth. Pressing the back of his hand to his mouth, he closed his eyes and took a careful breath so as not to lose that bare control over the need to cough. Another smaller town may not have stretched him so thin, but Konoha was alive and thriving like a human pulse rate as lively as Naruto himself. Naruto belonged here, Itachi did not. Not anymore. Even if he loved the village and fighting to keep all the people safe. He would never feel right living here again.

“I think this is a good place.” Naruto’s voice sounded oddly softer and closer this time, like he suddenly realized what might be the problem. The apology was written in his tone and the way his pull came more as a suggestion instead of force this time. Itachi went, more capable of following the lead this time than before. His muscles quivered from the intensity of before and he felt utterly drained of energy. His stamina had suffered a great deal from his illness before, but this was more from an abrupt loss of adrenaline.

The sound of a door opening along with the ring of a bell alerted him that they were entering a store and the next moment he felt the impact of his toe colliding with the slight rise into the shop. Clenching his teeth, he impulsively let go of the younger and gripped the door frame instead.

“Damn it, sorry Itachi… I didn’t think to tell you…” Itachi held up a hand to silence him and shook his head. Using the foot not injured, he traced the rise with the edge of his sandal before going inside. Once he felt the door close behind him, a sinking reality hit of just how hard this would be. The brush of Naruto’s fingers to his sleeve had him carefully curling his fingers into the blonde’s sleeve this time. Not so desperate now that a good deal of the noise was left behind the door leading to the world outside.

At his side, he heard Naruto shift sheepishly, that now familiar sound of his rubbing at his hair at the back of his neck meeting his ears. “Heh, I didn’t really think about it when we left. This must be pretty rough, huh? Like… I know how much Sasuke relies on his eyes.” The sharingan. The unspoken word making something pain in his head like a muscle memory for something that was no longer there. “Just tell me if I’m going too fast.” He nervously laughed. “I forget important things sometimes when I get…”

“Excited?” Itachi supplied the word, picturing Naruto like an over eager puppy, eyes set on a goal and not wholly aware of the surroundings. Not at first. The younger had a good heart and whatever discomfort he caused was wholly unintentional. “It’s fine.”

“Well, not really, but thanks… heh.” Noting the slide of sandals, he imagined the jinchuuriki turning on his heal and facing the shop like it was some monumental task waiting to be conquered. “Let’s get you some clothing! OI! Can someone help me get this guy in some respectable clothes?”

“Naruto-kun! Of course! Any friend of… yours.” The pause in the words must be from when they noticed just who was standing behind the village hero.

“Yep! And he’s a good friend and deserves the best.” Naruto added overly proud of himself and giving no space for argument.

“Of course, of course. What sort of clothing would the gentleman like?”

“Something eye catching, dattebayo!”

Itachi blinked at that, all the alarms going off in his head as he remembered Naruto’s trademark color clothing in safety orange. “Naruto… I don’t…”

“Oh! This is nice! It’s my favorite color.” Once again Itachi was being pulled relentlessly forward, his dark eyes wide in fear. “Itachi! You’d look good in this!”

“If it’s orange, absolutely not.” His voice was sharp and gave no room for argument.

“What?? What’s wrong with orange! It’s the best, dattebayo!” He felt the shirt being pressed against his and he frowned flatly.

“No orange.” If Naruto wouldn’t listen, he would turn his ire on the salesman. “I refuse to wear anything brightly colored… especially orange.”

The man laughed nervously as Naruto interjected in a half whine. “But Itachi! It’s easy to see…”

“No.”

“Stop being so stubborn you damn Uchiha.” Naruto sounded like he was pouting more than he was angry. “You’re as bad as Sasuke.”

Sending the teen a flat look, he heard the clerk nervously mention the same shirt came in black and hurried off to find it. Itachi rubbed his forehead as the blonde continued to loudly complain about Uchiha and their lack of fashion sense and their monochrome tendencies. And soon he felt him let go to look at something while Itachi stood there brow furrowed in irritation. If he went back with anything orange… he might have to kill Naruto later for his own pride’s sake.

The door to the shop opened and the bell rang, but otherwise, the shop fell quiet again. That is, until Naruto’s cheerful voice broke out again. “That’s it! We can get you a bell!”

This time, he pressed his hand over his face and groaned audibly. “No, Naruto. Just… no.”

Obviously Naruto didn’t hear him as he started talking about red ribbons with bells on the end to tie up in his hair. And when Itachi glared in his general direction, the blonde laughed happily and added, “It’s that or a collar!”

Why did he agree to this?